Shady Springs Region Final: (1) Greg Ostertag vs. (2) Jeff Hornacek

Off to the final of the Shady Springs East Region we go. This matchup is a battle of 1990s Jazz legends in Greg Ostertag and Jeff Hornacek. The winner heads off to beautiful Farmer City, Illinois to take on the winner of the Provo, Utah Region between John Stockton and Chris Mullin. Just like the 1st round, votes should be based off of ability to play fundamentally sound basketball, goofiness, upside, and most importantly, token white boy swag. A poll will open up on the right hand column for the next seven days. At the end of the week, the player with more votes obviously moves one step closer to the title.


Greg Ostertag
(click name for highlight video)
College: Kansas
Years in League: 1995-2005
Teams: Jazz, Kings

Oh. my. goodness. Where to begin with Greg Ostertag. The crafty one seed out of the Shady Springs regional is the first player featured in the tournament who quite frankly swings and misses on the concept of talent. Known around the league as "Postertag" for getting posterized so many times in his career, this 7'2" menace rocked the #00 with pride for the majority of his career alongside many other great whites in Utah. From his laser precision flat top to his tattoo of Fred Flinstone dunking on his calf, Greg Osterag practically screams white. One columnist noted after a game in 1999, "You couldn't slide a credit card under 'Tag's' vertical leap." Off the court, Greg was allegedly just as much of an animal and even landed himself a picture on Playgirl Magazine. Averaging nearly as many turnovers as points throughout his career, Ostertag will be remembered as perhaps the whitest man to not only play in the NBA, but to ever step foot on this earth.



Jeff Hornacek
(click name for highlight video)
College: Iowa State
Years in League: 1986-2000
Teams: Suns, 76ers, Jazz

How white is Jeff Hornacek? Burnside once said that he "looks like the old guy that nobody wants on their church league team." Apparently nobody wanted him on their college team, so the Iowa State Cyclones were lucky enough to have him work off. He made the rest of the country pay though, especially the Miami Redskins, who he beat with an Onions worthy buzzer beater in the NCAA Tournament, and the second seeded Michigan Wolverines, who he knocked off to send the Clones to their first ever Sweet Sixteen. He never really peaked until 1994 when he packed his bags and headed for Salt Lake City. Although Hornacek never could bench press as much as Aaron Carter, he made impact in the league because of his shooting and fundamental play. This even landed him a spot on the Utah Jazz coaching staff once he retired, and some are speculating that he will be named head coach at the end of the year. He once made 67 free throws in a row (each christened with his trademark cheek touch), won the three point contestant twice, and even took home the trophy for the NBA-WNBA Tag Team Two-Ball Challenge along with Natalie Williams of the Utah Starzz (no, that's actually how it was spelled). Straight from farm country to Mormon country, this white boy used fundamentally sound basketball to cement himself as an immortal in Jazz country. Hold on, I think I hear Don "Moose" Lewis calling him up right now.